Happy Birthday Granny

It's one day late, but yesterday was my Granny's 100th birthday. I thought about her and how much I miss her. I remembered the "candy drawer" in her kitchen. It was lined with foil and full of candy bars and sweet tarts. In another drawer she hid her cigarettes in an old band-aid can...I found them and smoked them....sorry Granny. Her freezer was always stocked with ice cream "sand-witches" and orange push-ups.

She would love the daffodils blooming now. Her thrift has been in full bloom, and the white iris she gave us years ago have started to bloom. Granny always had a surprise for us. Whether it was her latest crochet project, or a bucket full of bitties that had just hatched out. I loved when we were staying with her and we would have our early morning trip to the Piggly Wiggly. Even though she lived on very little money, I remember her taking me to the candy aisle and telling me to get anything I wanted. That was Granny.

I hope she and Aunt Laverne celebrated her day together, although I know Aunt Laverne rubbed it in that she's the only relative to ever get a cake I decorated. I miss you Granny and hope you know how much you meant to me.....you were the best. I hope where ever you are you can see my yard and know you are always present in my heart every time I walk and look at my flowers. Happy Birthday Granny!

A Year Later

It's one year today that you've been gone Aunt Laverne. I was at work today and I thought about you so much. I thought about how hard your life was and you managed to make it through day after day with little or no help. I thought about how funny you could be, and how stubborn you were (we're a lot alike...you said that too). I thought about Debbie and wondered if she's thinking about you. You are not forgotten and you never will be. I hope I can be as strong and determined as you were. I miss you and hope you know how much Mama and I love you.

Bits and Pieces

Daddy has always been tough. He grew up on a farm, and farmed up until my brother was born. He went to work with Southern Railway I guess the same year Buddy was born (1967), and stayed there until the early nineties. He survived having a car back over him, and then in 1979 having a train drag him down a track and roll over his leg. He went thru years of amputations and deadly infections. Years of hard rehab. I never saw him cry. I remember taking him for physical therapy when I was only 9 and wondering how he could stand the pain. He endured so much, and still managed to hold down a full time job all those years (which is why I get so angry at all the people on public assistance, but that's another story).

Just before the holidays I decided to ride to the Galleria to look for a couple of things. I asked my Dad if he wanted to go, and I was surprised when he said yes. We got to the mall and it was almost like a veil was lifted from my eyes. I saw my Dad who was always so strong.....now as a frail, old man. I was scared to let him walk too far from me: Afraid he might fall or someone might bump into him. I noticed his neck is wrinkled the same way his Mama's is. I wondered when he got so old. Every week Mama and I see the changes. A conversation we had a day before that he can't remember. An idea he gets stuck in his head and that's all we hear that day. A remark we make and Daddy gets it completely twisted around. I think these are the bits and pieces that are breaking away. It's not old age, it's different. He shakes so bad now he can't eat with a fork. If anything....and I mean anything....happens, he cries so hard he can't talk. It makes me angry that things can't be different and he and Mama can't travel the world during these years. It makes me sad that one day I know he might not remember me. I wonder if I'll be like him one day.

This is what family means. When you are family and you love each other, you take care of each other no matter what. You don't hope someone else will come and rescue you from your trouble. You pull together, keep your head down and plow thru. As long as I live and breathe, I hope I can take care of my family....in whatever little I can do.